With the loss of someone close comes a tidal wave of pain, darkness, absence and an overriding sense of bewilderment. Many days I sat questioning how anything would ever be okay again and if maybe in someway I deserved it. I still do and still will continue to do so, but one thing has shifted throughout the months my Dad has been gone. I have experienced the most resonant and overwhelming happiness that I have ever done before.
Many would ask “If I would change a thing.” No part of me would ever deny that I would sacrifice every ounce of my being to have my Dad back, but along with all the sadness and the accutely raw pain I have experienced in many elements of my life since Dad passed, only now have I been exposed to this overwhelming, enveloping happiness that I sit with at this very moment.
Now I can’t deny the inevitable trips and falls I will make in my grief, the setbacks and hinderances, but one thing is for sure that I now have amazing and overriding belief that I can be happy. How? I make it so. I myself can confidently say that I will mould and etch out my own happiness.
You have experienced some of the darkest days you may ever have to, you have seen death, you have known what it is like to lose yourself and someone else in one split second, but you also now have access to the highest level of beautiful emotions that you may ever know because you have accessed the lowest level. Know that your life will be what you make it, don’t be scared to reach out and grasp every beautiful thing that you can because you deserve real happiness. It will be tough, it may not be obvious and it will take time- but guess what? That is what makes life one glorious adventure.
“I chose to be happy today.”
All my love,
LJ
xx
believement 